Relationships

Having cancer may change the way that a patient relates with family, friends, and colleagues.  Patients may find that the stress going through a cancer diagnosis and treatment strengthens their relationships with loved ones.  While some relationships provide much needed support, other relationships may unexpectedly lead to frustration.  In many cases, stress in the relationship is caused by misunderstandings and confusion of how to offer support to a cancer survivor.  Many want to offer support, but they just do not know how.  With open communication, these issues may be resolved.

After treatment ends, some friends, family, or coworkers may appear to show less support due to their belief that the cancer is gone.  They may seem unsupportive due to anxiety and other emotions; speaking with that friend, family member, or coworker can help to mend and strengthen relationships. As survivors work through relationships to figure out what matters most in their life, some may choose to let some casual friendships go as they focus more on those that are more valuable and meaningful.          

In addition to dealing with their own feelings, a cancer survivor may also have to cope with their friends and families feelings of sadness and uncertainty.  Everyone needs recovery time, both the cancer survivor and those close to them. 

Family members and friends of different ages face different challenges.  For example, young children may convince themselves that they were somehow to blame for the cancer.  Teenagers, on the other hand, may find it difficult to cope because they may feel they have been forced back into the family just as they were beginning to break free and gain their independence.  Remember that silence can block communication and that open communication is critical to maintain healthy relationships.