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CancerQuest > Introduction to Patient Information > Survivorship: Overview > Information for Caregivers > Caring for Parents and Spouses

Caring for Parents and Spouses

Taking Care of a Parent
Adult children taking care of a parent account for 41% of caregivers, making it the largest source of caregivers in the United States. ⁽¹⁾ Parents may have difficulty letting their child take care of them because they are used to providing and looking after their children. The role reversal in these situations requires the caregiver to be particularly sensitive. ⁽²⁾

Taking Care of a Spouse
Spouses represent 23% of caregivers caring for people over the age of 65, second only to child caregivers. ⁽¹⁾ Going through cancer diagnosis and treatment can be stressful on any relationship. Couples often feel anxiety over new issues that may arise, including treatment decisions, effectively communicating, changing roles in the relationship, and changes in sexual intimacy.

It is important to keep in mind that everyone expresses emotions differently. Spouses may react in a different way than their caregiver might expect. It is best that caregivers listen to the wants and needs of the patient.

Cancer and cancer treatment can change the way couples connect emotionally and physically. Caregivers should be aware that there are many reasons for this: their partner may be in pain, fatigued, uncomfortable with their appearance, disinterested in sex, or unable to perform sexually. These feelings are normal and can be addressed. Despite these barriers to intimacy, couples can still connect on a deep emotional level by spending quality time together, talking to a therapist or talking to each other about how to best reconnect. ⁽³⁾

Click here to watch the entire interview with Lori and DeWayne Grice.

References for this page:

1. Spector, W. D. et al. The Characteristics of Long-Term Care Users. AHRQ Publication No. 00-0049. Rockville: Agency for Healthcare Research and Policy, 2000.
2. Adapted from National Caner Institute. When Someone You love is Being Treated for Cancer. U.S. National Institutes of Health. Accessed Aug. 10, 2007 [http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/When-Someone-You-Love-Is-Treated/page3 ]
3. Adapted from National Caner Institute. Caring for the Caregiver. U.S. National Institutes of Health. Accessed Aug. 7, 2007 [http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/caring-for-the-caregiver/page1]